Dear Steve,

I know most people call you Mr. Jobs or something along those lines, as you co-founded only the best company ever, Apple, but I like to think I can call you Steve. Being a loyal Apple customer, I was so psyched about getting the iPhone. An iPhone for $200?! Seriously, it’s pretty much all I have been talking about since the keynote last month. I was ready to throw my Blackberry Pearl out of my moving SUV on I-94 and throw myself on my knees at the shiny, pretty Apple store on Friday in front of some freaked out sales associate and beg that they had one left for me after I got out of work.

You have deceived me though. I guess if you want to get technical, I was trying to deceive you by jailbreaking my new iPhone and run it with my Tmobile SIM card and Blackberry plan instead of paying up the ass by canceling my current plan, moving over to AT&T and then paying their ridiculous amounts for iPhone plans, but those are just details.

Minor details.

I’ve been thwarted and my plan ruined.

This whole activation in store shit really messed me up. Yeah, I guess AT&T is picking up some of the cost which is why it’s going to be so cheap now but c’mon, man, I thought we were friends.

No, now I am stuck with this stupid, busted ass Blackberry Pearl. I’ve had this phone for almost 2 years. This is OLD technology! I’m suppose to be on time of my game here and you, Mr. Jobs, along with AT&T are making it hard for me. Why not open service plans up other companies? You would make so much more money. Isn’t that what this is all about? Money?

So today, I gave up and gave in.

I called up Tmobile and am having them send me a replacement Pearl (that cost me $120! $80 more and I could be living the Apple life to the fullest!). One with a moving trackball and working menu key because I won’t be partaking in the iPhone excitement tomorrow with all the other cool kids.

I bet the iPhone’s menu key always works. You don’t even need a trackball because it’s touch screen. I won’t even get a little taste of that.

Nope, not Jamie.

Maybe I’ll be able to find one on craigslist or ebay or maybe some kind soul who is upgrading will sell me their old one. You know, the older generation iPhone.

For now though, Steve, I think we need to take some time apart. I can’t deny I’m hurt by this.

I hope you understand.

Sincerely,

Jamie of Oh! How Lovely!